Guilty

I was reading one of my really old poems today, and I got hit hard by one of the lines. It read, "They wait here so patiently for those who don't arrive" Immediately after reading this line I got this idea about me being up in Heaven and just waiting for others that I love to come through the gates. It got me so upset because I so desperately want to see everyone I love and everyone in general to go to Heaven, and it's so scary to think that people will miss out, and I feel like I so desperately want God to use me to bring in the harvest, especially those I'm closest too. I'm so tired of waiting patiently because I worry about the little time there is. I don't want someone to die before they accept Christ, die to themselves and live for Him. I don't want to wait patiently when I could be out their serving or spreading the good news, but I have no courage, no boldness, I need so much help from my Lord Almighty. I'm so dependant on Him and I so desperately need Him to work more rapidly, so I must pray and continue to pray, be in constant prayer. Ironically enough the title of the poem is called, "How to Get Away with Murder". I thought about this and I think about how God will still let me into Heaven if I don't contribute to helping these people, but at the same time by not helping them in some way I'm murdering them, I'm dooming them to an eternity of suffering if I don't spread the good news of Christ. This is the message I got out of it, there is NEVER a bad time to share the good news of Jesus Christ. I'm tired of people telling me to wait on when I think the Holy Spirit is telling me to do something, all that does is confuse me and make me doubt that He has not yet given us the ability to spread the good news. As soon as we were saved we became apart of this servanthood to spread the good news. Any other way about it is a lie or deception. There is always time to here about Jesus. There is always time to share Jesus with others. What he did should never be kept secret or held back. We are already led by the Spirit to share his Word and it is not selfish to proclaim the good news of Jesus Christ. I'm not proclaiming I died on the cross nor do I have a kingdom to establish. I'm not looking for succees, name, or money. I want to see God's kingdom grow and with that attitude any and every moment is time enough to spread the news. Don't try and lie to me and say that it's not true, and don't lie to yourselves. The only person I'm listening too is me and God. And when I listen to me chances are I'm going to doubt myself, so hopefully I just listen to God. I'm going to put the whole poem in this blog now:

How to Get Away with Murder

Guilty as charged, a crime has been committed
Quite frankly it doesn't seem anyone took consideration
Unfortunately the maker of these atrocities will be acquitted
And this person may just lose all their admiration

Quite Frankly it doesn’t seem anyone took consideration
Consumed in pain he runs away in utter fear
And this person may just lose all their admiration
Notice they came in droves to show why they are here

Consumed in pain he runs away in utter fear
Fear led us to the end of this very lively tale
Notice they came in droves to show why they are here
Their bodies broken, but one remains so frail

Fear led us to the end of this very lively tale
Brought us war and peace that came throughout the ages
Their bodies broken, but one remains so frail
Deep inside of that one mind yet another battle rages

Brought us war and peace that came throughout the ages
Distant memories is what claimed the souls of those alive
Deep inside of that one mind yet another battle rages
They wait here so patiently for those who don’t arrive

Distant memories is what claimed the souls of those alive
Unfortunately the maker of these atrocities will be acquitted
They wait here so patiently for those who don’t arrive
Guilty as charged, a crime has been committed